Monday, December 12, 2005

The Comfort Zone

I really like my comfort zone but today listening to the radio I was hit by a sentence that I heard.

They had been talking about things and I was not really paying attention except that I heard something and started thinking how I would sign it in American Sign Language (the radio is where I always hear things that I wonder how to sign.) Anyway I suddenly heard a statement that was made about how our dreams are not in our comfort zone.

I have spent several years working towards a dream. When I began grad school I wasn't even sure what I could do with the degree I was pursuing but I was very interested in the subject matter. Well, I've finally graduated after having a fantastic 6 weeks at the Clerc Center doing my internship. When I left there I was all ready to change jobs.

I'm home now and I've fallen back into my comfort zone. It's really comfortable here so much so that I fear I will stay right where I am. But my dream is not here. I have to leave my comfort zone and find my dream. I'm scared and I have no idea how or where to find it. I was ready to move to a new location this summer but then I came home and reality hit. I don't see how I can move. I have support services for my son here. To move would mean starting all over again. I can't work without the support services and there would be no time to establish them. I don't see any possibilities around here. But God put that little statement in my ear today for a reason. Maybe there will be a job somewhere that I don't have to relocate to. I have to keep on following through. There are two schools for the deaf near here (well sort of.) I planned to apply as a teacher but I don't think I can get certified in New Jersey (can't remember why right now) and I don't think the one here in PA will pay enough to cover my bills with the added cost of the commute (at least an hour) so I guess I just apply for my dream? Would God make it that easy?

I thought about sending my resume to the School of the Future that is opening up in Philadelphia this year but there were two problems.
1. The principal is a well known tech leader and my insecurities made that intimidating. (see my blog from August 19)
2. It would be really cool to work there (if they were even hiring an instructional technologist) BUT It's not my dream. My dream is to be an instructional technologist in a school for the deaf.

Maybe I'm reading more into this than is really there. Maybe this was not a nudge to move me out of my comfort zone that I like so well. It really is nice here:)

(I did sign up to take the Praxis test to prove to the state of Pennsylvania that I can do math, read and write. First step to applying for the Instructional Technology Specialist certification in PA even though I don't see how I will ever get a job.)

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